It be International Talk Like A Pirate Day, me mateys. Damn the souless heathen scurvy seven seas fer puttin' it on a Sat'rday, sose a pirate prof'sor cain't Talk Like A Pirate in class.
Ter Squealin' Pig o' a Lyin' Parrot
Jest finished givin' a lissen to ter ole N-P-Arrrrrh's Dis Amarican Lifey an' the scurvy dogs were re-runnin' a blather from nigh onto nine long sorry years ago about Ter Informant. A-D-M, Pirates To The World!™ But plunderin' people at ter rancid supermarrrrrhkets? Tis a sad day fer pirates e'erwhere when there be no high seas hijinks involved in piracy.
So cast off the lines, me hearteys! Pull up ter archor chains an' seize 'em fast. Let loose ter mainsails an' look lively there, ya scurvy dogs! Or it'll be the keel haul fer the lot o' you, fer sure.
Tap a cask o' rum fer me an' all those pirates who don't drink. An' don't be makin' no parley with anyone you don' trust -- lest it be another pirate. 'Cause there be no use tryin' to decide if you can trust ano'er pirate, savvy, 'cause we be pirates!
Dr. "Black Flag" Phil aka Black Davy Read