They Didn't Ask Me (dr_phil_physics) wrote,
They Didn't Ask Me
dr_phil_physics

It's Not Just The Red Staplers

It's December and on many college campuses we're moving into Last Week and Finals Week. That also means a fair chunk of students are either doing last minute research or studying in the library -- or they are finishing drafts of major papers.

Either way, if hard copies are involved, then staplers may not be far away. (And the Kindle Fire HD's auto miscorrect of stalkers instead of staplers may not be far from the truth. Read on, gentle reader.)

This piece from College and Research Library News details the horrors of Staplercide at Middle Tennessee State University and it's chilling. Information Literacy Librarian Jason Vance reveals:
The average life span for a stapler at my library’s reference desk this past semester was 15.3 days. The most common cause of stapler death was exhaustion. An exhausted stapler would staple once, and then jam, entering a state of nonresponsive “stapler shock.” After a librarian valiantly unjammed it, the stapler would muster one more staple before collapsing again. Often we were not able to intervene before a frustrated student began assaulting the jammed stapler. One should not beat a dead stapler.
Some staplers lasted no more than one day. The longest living stapler succumbed at the age of 45 days. May they all rest in peace.
And that's not the only crimes exposed.

You do not want to know what happened to the electric stapler -- if you're faint of heart.

Sadly, I feel better about some of the public staplers in the Physics Dept. The one in the old-old Physics Help Room (0077 Rood Hall) was mounted to the wall, but usually failed by mid-semester. My heavy duty Swingline metal staplers have served me well. But the Boston stapler I got in a value pack of office supplies when I had a second office up on the Engineering campus, it can work but not if you try to use it in your hand as opposed to on a firm flat surface.

I can see where student violence against staplers comes from. But like road rage, this doesn't make it right.

Just Say No To Staplercide.

And report stapler abuse when you see it.

Silence only compounds the problem.

Dr. Phil
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